


The Time Lord's Guide to a Healthy TARDIS

by Athenas_Owl



Category: Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Cotton Candy Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Fluff, House Cleaning
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-05-17
Updated: 2014-05-17
Packaged: 2018-01-19 16:53:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1477054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Athenas_Owl/pseuds/Athenas_Owl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A.K.A Spring Cleaning<br/>"Sexy isn't feeling well and I really don't understand why. It's not like her to be this upset!"<br/>"Could it be the socks on the console?"</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own any of the nouns (people, places, or things) that are in this story. I am not making any money from them and do not plan to. It's all fun and games...until someone takes it too seriously and I go to court.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Time Lord's Guide to a Healthy TARDIS  
> Step 1: A healthy TARDIS is a happy TARDIS. Always be aware of how your TARDIS is feeling. Be sure to first know the problem and then address it. If you are sure that your ship's health is the problem and it is not something more serious, then please continue reading.

Deep inside a blue police box, two people slept. One was a red headed girl with freckles on her cheeks and a smile on her lips. She dreamt of running away with the man she loved and her childhood friend. In her dreams, she found marvelous adventures and saw things that she would not remember when she woke up. Her husband, with his messy blond hair and slight snore, curled beside her and dreamt of nothing, for he had all he could ever want in his arms. But there was one person in the blue box that was still awake that night. He had been awake and working for quite some time. That same man would continue to labor over his box when the sleeping couple awoke the next morning.

The Doctor had been tinkering with the TARDIS all through the night, trying to make her feel better. But no matter what he did, still she seemed to be upset. He had tried replacing all the parts that he could (granted, some pieces were too difficult to find overnight). He had tried waving around the sonic, checked her wires, and had even taken her temperature, but she wasn't overheating or chilled. The Doctor had been preparing to sing her a lullaby and make her some warm milk when the sleeping couple had emerged from their room. 

Amy stumbled into the console room of the TARDIS first. The Doctor looked up to find her yawning and rubbing her eyes like a small child. The girl was clad in her softest pyjamas, still wrinkled from sleep. Her fiery hair was reaching out in a thousand different directions and there was a barely noticeable stain on the side of her mouth where she had drooled in the night. The Doctor smiled at the sight of his close companion in such disarray.

"Sleep well?" He asked softly.

"Mmm..." Amy mumbled in response.

"Perhaps some tea?" Offered the third member of the party. Rory had toddled out behind Amy with a lopsided smile. He had gone mostly unnoticed in his baggy t-shirt and boxers, but as soon as he mentioned tea, he became rather popular. A chorus of "Oh!" and "Yes please!" ushered him out of the console room. He headed where he thought the kitchen might be, trusting that if he wasn't right, the TARDIS would take it into her own hands to put him back on course. As soon as Rory had left, Amy plopped down on the steps and turned to the Doctor.

"Were you up all night?"

"Unfortunately," The Doctor nodded. "Yes, I was. Sexy isn't feeling well and I don't understand why. It's really not like her to be this upset!"

Amy snorted. "Could it be the socks on the console? What about the plastic bags stuffed under the door? Surely that would make anyone groan, machine or not."

The Doctor reeled back, a look of horror and indignation plastered on his face. "Amelia Pond! I would never let her get so..." He drifted off in confusion as Amy reached beneath the stairs where she sat. When she withdrew her hand, her nails were thick with bubble gum.

"You were saying?"

The Doctor shook his head, mortified. "I guess I just got so caught up in traveling that I forgot to take care of my girl. I'm sorry!" He patted the column to his left as he spoke. The TARDIS groaned in response, then started up a slightly off-kilter version of her signature wheezing noise. "Take you somewhere nice and relaxing, eh? We'll get you all fixed up! Let's do some _spring cleaning_!" The Doctor raced up the stairs so that he could throw a few levers and tap a couple buttons before they finally lurched off the ground.

From an adjoining room, they could hear the faint sounds of swearing accompanied by the crash of a tea kettle smashing to the floor. Seconds later, Rory stumbled into the console room to join the Doctor and his companion. Hanging his head, Rory sighed. "That tea might not be finished for some time now."


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _The Time Lord's Guide to a Healthy TARDIS_  
>  Step 2: Break it up. Even if it might seem like the chores are infinite, chances are you'll get it done sooner or later. Dividing the chores amongst multiple people will make the tasks much easier and ensure that you get done sooner and have more time afterwards to enjoy your freshly groomed ship.

The TARDIS had never been stealthy. Perhaps it was the influence of the loud man who had driven her for years, or maybe it was their lack of stealth which had drawn them together in the first place. No matter how it came to happen, when the box touched down on a soft green hill in Southern Scotland, she didn't even try to make her appearance a quiet one. Her wheezing echoed over the grassy spans of land, sending sheep scattering in all directions. The din of the TARDIS and the baying of the sheep was interrupted by the creaking of a poorly-oiled door as the Doctor made his exit. 

"Beautiful _choice_ , my dear! I love it! Always have been partial to Scotland. Ever since I had that trip with...oh...that's not important right now anyway. I had a different face then. Different reason to be here." The Doctor spun about and flung his arms out wide. "Same happy memories though!"

The Doctor clapped his hands joyfully and glanced back to find Amy and Rory stepping hesitantly out of the doors. 

"Come along now," The Doctor chirped as he pushed past them. "We've got work to do."

The Time Lord vanished into his box for mere seconds, but emerged with an armful of tools piled high up to his face. He wavered for a split-second before letting the tools crash to the ground. Paint rollers, oil cans, screwdrivers (the ones that could use a bit more sonic), and sponges rolled in all directions. Even a vacuum seemed to have found it's way onto the ground. 

"Doctor?" Amy started, "Where were you keeping all this? And why didn't you make Rory clean the TARDIS sooner?"

"Hey! I do more than cook and clean you know!" Rory butted in. He was promptly ignored, per usual.

"I didn't think it mattered." At Amy's shocked look, the Doctor launched into his explanation. "Oh, I assumed that since the TARDIS was a dimension within itself, and even one with a conscience, it would take care of its cleaning as it does its mental and emotional needs. Clearly, I was wrong." The Doctor beamed with all the joy of a child on Christmas morning. "Oh, I do so love it when I'm wrong. It means I've met someone cleverer than me. And that's exciting! Doesn't happen very often you know. I like to think I'm quite clever."

"Alright, enough of that. We'd better get to work before the Doctor starts wandering off." Amy bobbed her head in a business-like manner. "I'll take the main room. What are you doing Rory?"

Rory shrugged with a flail of his long limbs. "Where do you need me?"

The Doctor, who had been sitting on the ground counting the tools, instantly raised his hand high in the air. Rory and Amy shared a silent look. "Yes Doctor?" Asked Rory.

"Would you like to do the outside with me Rory? I'm going to wash it and then paint it." The Time Lord produced a bucket of blue paint from who-knows-where to show the nurse.

"Sure." Rory nodded. "I guess I don't need to change if I'll be painting?" He gestured to his old sleep clothes.  
The Doctor took out a sponge and a bucket of water which he then placed roughly in Rory's arms. "Nope. We're getting right to work. Chop chop people! Let's get this party started!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I plan to update at the end of each week from now on. If you liked it, kudos or comments are great motivation to write more!

**Author's Note:**

> This is un-beta'd and I'm not British by any stretch of the imagination so if I made any mistakes, please feel free to let me know. I'd rather fix it than go on letting people read my fic with an error in it.


End file.
